Don't Stop Searching
by RBabe500
Summary: One shot song fic to the Good Charlotte song "Hold On". Jou and Seto are both looking for escapes in their lives. On one cold night, will they find their escape in each other?


Ack. Someone slap me. I am a bad, bad, bad girl. I shouldn't be writing other stories when I haven't finished Open Your Eyes yet. I just couldn't help it. I had this _great_ idea and I had to write it! But this is only a one shot, so it doesn't count, right? Hehe.  
  
Disclaimer: Ok, Yu-Gi-Oh isn't mine, nor is the song "Hold On" by Good Charlotte. But somehow, I think you all knew that.  
  
~Don't Stop Searching~  
  
I lie on my bed, enjoying the serenity of my room. Even though the room is the size of a closet and contains only my bed and a dresser filled with a few clothes, it is all I have in the world, and I love it. In my room, I can lock the door, lie on the bed, shove on my headphones, and, if only for a time, forget the troubles that rest on my soul every day. It is my only escape from a life that I do not wish to live.  
  
Downstairs, I can hear the door bang open. My father is home. The stench of alcohol makes its way up the steps and into my room. I wrinkle my nose in disgust. Even though I have come to be able to stand the smell, it never ceases to bother me.  
  
I hear his footsteps, heavy, as he attempts to make his way up the steps. I can only pray that he is too drunk to manage it. Considering how strong the smell is, I figure he must have had a lot to drink. Maybe I'll get lucky.  
  
As I hear a thud on the steps, my thoughts are confirmed. He has collapsed on the steps. I will not be bothered tonight by his fist.  
  
I wait for a while, allowing time to make sure that he is truly knocked out. When I am sure he is, I open my door quietly, making sure not to make any sounds that will awaken him. Even though I doubt that anything could awaken him, I do not want to take any chances.  
  
I start down the steps. Lying on the steps toward the bottom I see my father, passed out. With as much grace as I can manage, I step around him, making my way down to the first floor. I grab my jacket from the chair where I threw it this afternoon, then exit out the door, grateful for this brief chance to escape a life that I do not wish to live.  
  
*This world, this world is cold*  
  
*But you don't, you don't have to go*  
  
*You're feeling sad, you're feeling lonely*  
  
*And no one seems to care*  
  
*Your mother's gone and your father hits you*  
  
*This pain you cannot bear*  
  
I do not know where I am going. It's 10:00 at night. It's too late to go to Yugi's house, or anyone else's house for that matter. So, as I have numerous nights before, I wander the streets of Domino City, just another lost soul hiding in the shadows of dark alleyways.  
  
As I walk, I find myself thinking about my life. Not my life with my father, because that is something that I am trying to escape for now. The life that I do not really have is what I am thinking about. I have two lives, two lives destined to never meet.  
  
One is the life that everyone knows. I'm Jou, the stubborn goofy- ball duelist that everyone knows, whether they like me or not. But I'm also Jounouchi, the quiet kid who learned a long time ago when to shut up and how to take blows without crying out. I am not as dumb as people think I am. I just hide my true self. Maybe I'm still scared to let people get close to me. Everyone I love, I lose.  
  
I love my mom and sister, and I haven't seen them in years. I loved my dad at one point, and he returned my love by beating me. And I love Seto Kaiba. But he is not even worth thinking about.  
  
I must be a fool after all. I must be, because I love the one man I could never have. I love the one man who makes me feel worthless, even more worthless than my dad makes me feel. Kaiba knows just what to say to get me riled up. Just what to say to make me want to explode inside. But at the same time as I feel those emotions, his words also make me want to hold him, kiss him, make love to him.  
  
I must be a fool.  
  
*But we all bleed the same way as you do*  
  
*And we all have the same things to go through*  
  
*Hold on if you feel like letting go*  
  
*Hold on, it gets better than you know*  
  
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~  
  
I cannot sleep. It is almost 10:00 at night, and I have no desire to sleep, although after the stressful day I have just had, I cannot imagine why I would not want to surrender myself to peaceful dreams. But even as my body lies in bed, my mind goes off on its own, thinking thoughts that I do not want to think.  
  
In the room next to mine, I can hear Mokuba's heavy breathing. He is fast asleep, unburdened with the weights that I hold on my shoulders. He is young, and should not have to deal with such monsters. But I was only his age when my chains were placed on me, and did anyone care?  
  
He does not know how lucky he is. He has so many people who care about him. Me, his friends, everyone loves Mokuba. I suppose that I am almost jealous of him, though why I cannot imagine. I always thought that Mokuba was all I needed in the world. I have no need for anyone else. So I push other people away. People that I almost wish I hadn't.  
  
Yugi, Anzu, Honda, Ryou, I have pushed them all aside, even when they openly offered me their friendship. Yet I am stubborn and refused it. I refused something that I might have enjoyed.  
  
The only one who has never offered me friendship is the one that I want the most- Jounouchi. That mutt is the one I most want to be close to, yet he is always just out of my reach. He is the one I pushed away the most, because he is the one I most want to be close with.  
  
*Your days, you say they're way too long*  
  
*And your nights, you can't sleep at all*  
  
*But you're not sure what you're looking for*  
  
*But you don't want to no more*  
  
*And you're not sure what you're waiting for*  
  
*But you don't want to no more*  
  
I cannot stand this house any longer. I cannot stand the silence, the deafening silence that allows my thoughts to get louder and louder, making my head ache. I have to get out.  
  
I open my door quietly, although why I do not know. It is not for fear of waking Mokuba up. That kid could sleep through anything. I guess I just am afraid to break the silence of the house.  
  
I head down the steps to the first floor. I am already wearing a jacket, so without any hesitation, I head out the door and into the dark night.  
  
*But we all bleed the same way as you do*  
  
*And we all have the same things to go through*  
  
*Hold on if you feel like letting go*  
  
*Hold on, it gets better than you know*  
  
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~  
  
The night air whipped around Jounouchi as he wandered the deserted streets. He pulled his green jacket tighter around him, almost wishing he had stayed home.  
  
'No,' he thought. 'Not even the freezing cold air could stop me from this brief escape. Nothing on earth can.'  
  
On the other side of the street, Seto was thinking the same thing. 'I should have worn a heavier jacket. Still, just getting away from everything was worth it.'  
  
Sighing, Seto looked around at his surroundings. Nothing looked familiar, he realized with a start. 'How far have I walked?' he thought uneasily. 'Where am I?'  
  
Suppressing the panic growing in his stomach, Seto managed to cross the street. From where he had been standing, he had seen someone else walking there. 'I hope _they_ know where I am.'  
  
Clearing his throat, Seto approached the figure leaning against the building wall. "I'm just wondering, do you know what street this is?" he asked, wishing he could see the person's face.  
  
"What's this? The great Seto Kaiba asks directions from _me_?"  
  
'I know that voice.' Seto thought with a start. 'Jou!'  
  
"Jounouchi?" he asked, a slight hopefulness in his voice.  
  
Jou stepped out of the shadows and into the light from the streetlamp. "Yeah, it's me."  
  
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~  
  
He looks so beautiful right now. The light from the streetlamp gives his face a heavenly glow, his golden hair the perfect halo. It is almost ironic. The one person that I was thinking about earlier this night is now standing in front of me, yet I still cannot find words to tell him how I feel. How is it that I, Seto Kaiba, am afraid to tell someone my feelings?  
  
"Jou, listen. I was out walking, and I got lost. Do you know where we are and how I can get back home?"  
  
He smirks. "I dunno. Why should I help you, after everything you've done to me?"  
  
Anger boils up inside my stomach. How dare he talk to me like that! "Listen, mutt, I don't have time for this."  
  
His smirk grows wider. He is enjoying this! I let my anger get the best of me. With lightning quick reflexes, my hands reach out and press him against the wall. My face is only inches from his, and I see the defiant look still glowing in his eyes.  
  
"I don't have time for this, mutt!"  
  
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~  
  
Their faces were mere inches apart. Seto had Jounouchi pressed against the building, holding him there with his body. Jou had been surprised at the sudden attack, but he hid his surprise and his eyes continue to defy Seto.  
  
"I don't have time for this, mutt!" Seto yelled, clear annoyance in his voice. "Just tell me what I need to know so I can go home!"  
  
Jou looked at Seto for a moment, then smiled. "Maybe I don't want you to go home yet," he said mysteriously.  
  
'Huh?' was the only thought going through Seto's head, but he didn't have time to think about it before he felt Jou's lips on his. Without even realizing it, he kissed back, tracing Jou's lips with his tongue, asking permission to enter.  
  
For what seemed like ages, the two stood there, Seto pressing Jou against the wall, their lips locked in a passionate kiss. Eventually, the need for oxygen forced them apart, and the two stood for a moment looking into each other's eyes. No words were needed as years of pent-up emotions flashed through their eyes, saying all the things that their pride would not allow them to speak out loud.  
  
Without another thought, the two came back together, kissing each other with a great need and hunger.  
  
*Don't stop looking, you're one step closer*  
  
*Don't stop searching, it's not over*  
  
*Hold on*  
  
*What are you looking for?*  
  
*What are you waiting for?*  
  
*Do you know what you're doing to me?*  
  
*Go ahead*  
  
*What are you waiting for?*  
  
* Hold on if you feel like letting go*  
  
*Hold on, it gets better than you know*  
  
*Don't stop looking, you're one step closer*  
  
*Don't stop searching, it's not over*  
  
* Hold on if you feel like letting go*  
  
*Hold on, it gets better than you know*  
  
*Don't stop looking, you're one step closer*  
  
*Don't stop searching, it's not over*  
  
*Hold on*  
  
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~  
  
I am kissing him. I am kissing him and that is all that matters right now. I can deal with tomorrow tomorrow. For now, I let all my troubles float away into the night. They do not matter.  
  
~End~  
  
Well, there you go. Hope you all enjoyed it. If you did, please review! *makes puppy dogg eyes* Please? ^_~ You know you want to. And hell, if you _didn't_ like the story and think it sucked majorly, feel free to tell me that too! But atleast let me know that _someone_ out there read this!  
  
Now I have to go and figure out what I'm going to do about Open Your Eyes, because I've written myself into a huge hole, and I don't know how to get out! Ahhhh!!!! *runs around in little circles waving hands over head frantically* Ahhhh!!!!  
  
Seto: Oh no. *looks around* Alright, who let her out of the mental hospital again?  
  
*gets led away by men in white coats*  
  
I'm not crazy! Really! I'm not! Hey, look, a flying piggy!  
  
~TaLoN~ 


End file.
